Are You Losing Gen Alpha Without Even Realizing It?

7 Ways to Build Trust with the Next Generation

Trust is at the heart of every meaningful relationship.

Parent and child. Teacher and student. Coach and athlete. Mentor and emerging leader.

And after more than 32 years of working with young people, I believe one thing has become increasingly clear:

We cannot lead the next generation effectively until we earn their trust.

Generation Alpha, the generation following Gen Z, has grown up in a world very different from the one many of us experienced as children. Technology has always been at their fingertips. Information is immediate. Their world is highly visual, personalized, connected, and fast-moving.

But underneath all of that technology and change, they still need what young people have always needed.

They need adults who see them.

Adults who listen to them.

Adults who mean what they say and follow through with what they do.

Adults they can trust.

As a dance studio owner and youth educator for more than 30 years, I’ve had the privilege of watching generations of children grow up in my classrooms. I’ve also worked alongside youth educators across the country and heard both the wins and the challenges they experience while leading today's young people.

While generations change, one leadership principle doesn't:

Trust must come before influence.

If we want young people to listen to us, learn from us, and eventually lead alongside us, we first have to build a relationship strong enough to carry that influence.

So how do we do that with today's emerging generation?

First, Understand the Generation You're Leading

Generation Alpha shares some important characteristics with Generation Z. They are comfortable with technology, value authenticity, and have grown up expecting individual differences to be recognized and respected.

But there are also shifts we need to understand.

They have grown up with instant access to information and entertainment, which means keeping their attention can require greater creativity and engagement.

They are accustomed to personalization. They want to be recognized as individuals rather than simply another member of the group.

Many also have highly involved parents who expect communication, connection, and an understanding of the individual needs of their child.

None of these traits are necessarily good or bad.

They simply give us information.

And strong leaders don't complain about the generation they have been given to lead. They learn how to lead them well.

Here are seven ways we can begin.

1. Meet Them in Their World

Technology is not an "extra" for this generation. It has always been part of their lives.

That doesn't mean every interaction needs to happen through a screen. In fact, I believe face-to-face connection is more valuable than ever.

But we can use technology intentionally.

Short videos, visual demonstrations, interactive tools, digital communication, and concise instructions can help us connect with young people in ways that feel natural to them.

The goal isn't to compete with technology.

The goal is to use it as a bridge to connection.

2. Explain the Why

"Because I said so" isn't a particularly effective leadership strategy with this generation.

They want to understand.

Why does this rule exist?

Why are we practicing this again?

Why does being on time matter?

Why do I need to follow through when other people aren't?

Explaining the why doesn't mean children make every decision or that adults give up authority.

It means we connect expectations to purpose.

Instead of simply saying, "Be on time," we can explain:

"When you arrive on time, your teammates know they can count on you."

Now we aren't simply enforcing a rule.

We're teaching a leadership value.

3. See the Individual

One of the most powerful things we can give a young person is the feeling of being genuinely seen.

Notice their strengths.

Remember something they told you.

Ask about the dog that was sick last week.

Follow up about their weekend at Grandma's house.

Recognize the child who quietly helped another student without being asked.

These moments may seem small to us.

To a child, they communicate something much bigger:

You matter enough for me to remember.

And that is where trust begins.

4. Create Connection Before Correction

There will always be moments when we need to correct behavior, hold a boundary, or challenge a young person to do better.

But correction is received differently when there is already connection.

Young people are far more likely to accept coaching from someone they believe genuinely cares about them.

That doesn't mean lowering expectations.

Quite the opposite.

When trust exists, we can often raise expectations because the young person understands that our correction comes from wanting them to grow-not simply wanting them to comply.

5. Give Them a Voice Without Giving Away Leadership

Young people want to know their opinions matter.

Give them opportunities to contribute.

Ask what music they enjoyed.

Let them help choose between two activities.

Invite their ideas for a team project.

Ask, "What do you think would make this better?"

Giving young people a voice does not mean giving them complete control.

There is a significant difference between having a voice and having the final vote.

As adults, we are still responsible for creating healthy boundaries and making decisions.

But when young people know their perspective is valued, they become more invested in the outcome.

6. Be Consistent-Especially When It's Hard

This may be one of the most important trust-builders of all.

Say what you mean.

Do what you say.

Follow through.

Keep the boundary even when enforcing it is inconvenient.

Young people are constantly watching to see whether our actions match our words.

We can teach respect, responsibility, kindness, excellence, and integrity all day long.

But eventually they will look at us and ask—perhaps without ever saying the words:

Do you live it?

Our leadership becomes believable when our behavior matches the values we're asking them to practice.

7. Let Them See You Be Human

Strong leadership does not require pretending we never make mistakes.

In fact, one of the fastest ways to build trust with a young person can be saying:

"I handled that wrong."

"I should have listened better."

"I'm sorry."

"I don't know the answer, but let's figure it out."

Admitting a mistake doesn't diminish our leadership.

It models accountability.

We teach young people that being a leader isn't about being perfect. It's about having enough self-awareness and humility to recognize when we need to grow.

And perhaps that's one of the greatest leadership lessons we can give them.

Trust Is Built in the Small Moments

When I think about developing young leaders, I don't think trust is built through one big inspirational conversation.

It's built through hundreds of small interactions.

Remembering their story.

Keeping your promise.

Listening when you're busy.

Holding the boundary.

Celebrating progress.

Giving them another opportunity after they make a mistake.

Showing up again tomorrow.

Those moments become the foundation from which everything else grows.

Because before a young person will allow us to influence them, challenge them, coach them, or develop them into a leader...

they need to know they can trust us.

And that responsibility begins with us.

A Challenge for This Month

Choose one of these seven areas and become more intentional about it.

Maybe you need to listen more.

Maybe you need to explain the why.

Maybe you need to follow through more consistently.

Maybe there's a young person in your life who simply needs to know that you see them.

Don't try to change everything at once.

Choose one small leadership behavior and practice it consistently.

Because trust isn't built in a day.

It's built one interaction at a time.